the days do flow as such lately, and i just don’t focus on this blog as much as i would like to. but i am alive and well, moving my way through it all, and mostly enjoying the ride. today would actually be the three-month anniversary of my sinus surgery, now that i think about it. truthfully i live in constant low-grade terror that my affliction shall return, that the struggles shall resume, and overtake the regular, rewarding struggles. but for the most part i am ok. i may have had a cold last week, and i was freaked out. and i realized that part of why i was freaked out is that i don’t remember what it’s like to just have a cold anymore. but yes, i am ok. and trying to think positively about it all, taking the approach that if i think bad things are coming, they will come. so that’s that. i’m not really even on any meds, though i am doing some home remedies, and going for acupuncture on a fairly weekly basis. i can’t tell if it helps or exactly what it does but i know that it makes me feel different, and that if nothing else it relaxes me. so that’s good, because i definitely need it. i am taking the allergy pills, and will start going for regular shots now that i finally switched insurance providers. blah blah. boring stuff.

very briefly, because i need to hit the hay:

musically, i am alive again. in a way that maybe i haven’t been in a long time. something feels different. perhaps it’s just having my voice back, having a band that’s working well together, having things feel like they are slowly falling back in line. but i want to sing. i catch myself singing before i warm up my voice some days, which i’m not really supposed to do. but i do it anyway sometimes. i’ve gotten bogged down all these years by notions of rules, of what should and should not be. and now i find myself just wanting to sing and play and find that place where i am free to create and stay there for as long as i can. i guess i value everything more nowadays. i know it’s not like i was hit by lightning or like my heart stopped for a minute or something. but things are changed. this business is changed. and i want to find my way back to what i love about doing music so much that i can’t help it in spite of the fact that the business is fucked.

so anyway, we are back. fontana’s next month, rockwood after that. i play house of blues in LA in may, which i am really looking forward to. trying to book more around that on the west coast. solo shows to prep for. a new guy in the band that we actually like and get along with. and we are going to be changing everything around quite a bit. no more death of jason brody, or jason brody even. we are at sea. and i am liking that change. to be announced later.

improv is still on. my team is now like an official entity, practicing twice a week, doing a biweekly show at the creek and the cave in LIC. we are garamond. hear us roar. or at least, like, join our facebook group or something. i found an open ucb 401 class, finally, and jumped on it. so that starts the end of next month, too.

and i am in school at atlantic as well. learning how to be a “serious” actor. but seriously. learning skills that i think are useful and interesting, applicable to many facets of life. i was skeptical at first and still am at times, and i think some of that has to do with the mix of people in my class. but when i sit down and do the work, memorize lines for a scene, engage in that, it feels very natural and productive to me in a way that i didn’t expect. i’m like, yeah, i could see myself rehearsing and being in a play. why not? we’ll see. i have a LONG way to go, beginner that i am.

i work. i play. i come home late. it’s nice to be alive right now. i could be socializing a bit more, i suppose. but there are many kinds of socializing.

not sure what else. i got a fun haircut and i feel a little lighter. i like that it’s warming up outside. i look forward to travel soon. i may be moving.

and i may just fall asleep if i try. like now.