well, folks, it has been hectic lately to say the least. and it still is. I am at Roosevelt hospital right now, awaiting my call to the slab for sinus surgery. quite honestly, I am pretty terrified. terrified of surgery in itself. terrified that this will mess me up in some way. terrified that it won’t help me. this is an elective surgery, in that I could just deal with the problems i’ve been having, continue to search for natural solutions, etc., instead of allowing my doc to probe and cut stuff out from way up in my head with tiny instruments. but I suppose that after three doctors’ recommendations this should make sense to me. and then there’s my stupid penchant for living slightly dangerously, right? but apparently I am in good company, as win butler of the arcade fire and bono have both had sinus procedures. I’ve spent a good bit of the weekend scaring the shit out of myself by reading way too many horror stories online and being all cracked out on the steroids that my doc made me take to prep for the main event. and not being allowed to have a drop of booze for four days hasn’t helped anything. I am still freaked, but a strange calm has come over me. maybe it’s that I am so exhausted from poor sleep due to the ‘roids and nervousness, or it’s because I am weak from having to starve myself all day. but the idea is that this is going to help me, and for many people it does work. for some, it doesn’t, or problems recur and other surgeries are needed. i guess we’ll see.

so, lovelies, it is nearly my time to go under. assuming I wake up, do not lose my eyesight, and don’t get punctured through my brain I will be in touch very soon. there are other blog entries that I need to edit and post as well.

wish me luck, yeah?

the saga continues…

a comic about some kind of sinusy superhero seems in order at this point, because things have become, well, almost comical. sinus boy could wear a leotard with a big, oozy nose logo on the chest. he could ensnare villains in giant green snot bubbles, could do all kinds of things with ropes of mucus and whatnot, like whip people into submission, build bridges, fix broken model airplanes, etc. he could even transform himself into a viscous green blob and envelop things, support structures, sneak under doors and through walls and vents and such. he could solidify into a clot of boogers, if needed, too, i.e., during battle with his archenemy, while archenemy charges sinus boy, SB could turn himself into a concrete-hard snot wall, stunning the evildoer as he runs into it. and so on and so on and so on. sorry, i don’t mean to gross you out. but the sinus boy concept is amusing to me.

in all seriousness, i am sinus boy, hear my cavities roar. this week has been full of developments in sinusland. i had a CT scan of my sinuses on monday. saw my ENT on wednesday, and she went over them with me. i don’t know if you are familiar with CT scan results but mine don’t look very good. basically there are four pairs of sinuses in your head. when you look at one of these scans (i really should scan the scan and post it here so you can follow more easily) they are basically black, white, and shades of gray, white being bone/solid matter, black being empty space, gray being other stuff (nonsolid). in healthy sinuses the cavities would show up as black (open). there’s barely any black in my scan. pansinusitis, i think the lingo goes. so i am basically all clogged up, and the good doctor says that there may be some polypoid tissue in there, too, but you can’t really see this on a CT scan. in short it’s recommended that i have sinus surgery to clear out all the gunk and remove these possible polyps and open up the passages for better drainage. sounds fun, eh?

so i’m going for another ENT’s opinion, and it’s also recommended that i see my allergist/immunology guy before making a decision here. if this is something i need, i want to get it over with, as there have already been two tonsillectomy abortions, i’ve been ill off and on for months, and it has been my goal to get this madness sorted out before 2009 begins. so we shall see. hopefully if i’m doing this, i’m doing it soon.

yuck.

and fuck.