so here i am in good ol’ wellington at my mum’s. this is a lovely, pretty little town, but i have no idea what people do here. my mom seems quite happy and loves it here, and i can’t say i mind it for a few days, but i think i would go crazy if i lived in these parts. what do people do here? where do they go? it is hard to know without a car and only my hearing-impaired mother to guide me. i am just glad she’s happy.

i am relaxing for a change, and this is a good thing. i have a guitar and my laptop here but mostly i am just trying to chill and not beat myself up for not working too hard. i’ve had a raging sinus infection for days and i think that yesterday, finally, i turned the corner and might actually now be getting back to normal again. when i got here i was still hacking my brains out and my head felt like it was going to explode from the pressure in my sinus cavities. my tonsils are staying in, at least for another couple weeks, until this thing goes away and i can figure out what to do. but all of this will pass.

four days away from the winter cold with little to do is not so bad at all. i’ve been cooking dinner the past three nights, which is great fun when i have extra time and a real kitchen, and a grill outside. i’ve done sea scallops, sirloin with a garlicky lime marinade, and salmon on the grill with a honey soy thing that kind of worked but wasn’t quite thick enough to do what i had hoped it would. since there’s cable here i’ve been watching a lot of top chef, anthony bourdain: no reservations, and bizarre foods, which i absolutely adore. andrew zimmern is like tom colicchio’s perverse bastard stepcousin or something. it is hard to pull off oafish and intelligent at the same time, i think, but he does it well. he would probably be awesome to hang with. the paris episode made me want to go live there. i guess i like my food. is it too late to go to culinary school? maybe i need to pay off some student loans before thinking about that.

mostly having cable here reminds me why i dumped it–tv has for the most part become abysmal, sick with sad reality shows about people who, even when edited, are uninteresting and celebs who are desperate, i suppose, but are better off keeping their mysteries, well, mysteries. part of me feels like i need to watch all of this stuff, to know what’s out there, what’s going on, in the same way i feel like i should at least hear every new band i find out about. but sometimes it’s so hard to stomach. like there’s this dating show on one of the mtvs called next, which i lingered on for a bit while channel surfing. this has to be one of the dumbest things to have ever hit tv. i could feel the collective mind of the world rotting with every minute i watched. i know it’s been on for a while, too. i suppose it’s geared toward teenagers (i hope so, anyway), but still. those poor teenagers. most of the dating/love-based reality shows i’ve seen embarrass me, really, with celebs, without, whatever. i guess they’re just not my thing. i don’t have the attention span to watch people who could never interest me, even if they’re showing a little side boob or have gridlock-worthy emotional or/and substance-abuse problems or whatever.

i hate to be so judgmental. and in being that way, i am perhaps inadvertently judging all of the people who watch this garbage religiously. but what’s a blog for if not to rant and rave like you’re on some cybersoapbox? honestly, this blog is so safe. sometimes i feel like it’s a joke, i am holding back so much. but this casual, PG13 version is where i have arrived for the time being. not that full-blown honesty would be like peering into the mind of a sociopath or something. those of you who know me would attest to the fact that for the most part i’m a pretty good guy. but it would just be, well, deeper, if that makes any sense. and it might embarrass or offend certain people, which i don’t have the heart to do. and it might reveal too much about me, stuff i prefer to share in more intimate settings, with people i actually know face to face. so PG13 it is.

it is crazy to think that there are some newer people in my life that haven’t known me when i’ve been healthy. i am looking forward to dropping these crazy illnesses like the worst habit. the new year holds some great possibilities. the band continues to work on new stuff and we’re doing some interesting, dare i say more playful, things. i’ll get into that more another day. our more manageable/less fancy website is starting to get up and running. and i don’t want to speak too soon, but i think we may have found a new member for TDoJB. we’ll see in the coming weeks. but yes, things feel like they are coalescing after a bit of a chaotic time.

back home to my crazyish life in NYC tomorrow and it feels too soon. maybe next year i’ll strand myself down here for a week instead of half. happy thanksgiving, people. eat up and reflect on those lovely things in your world that make you glad to be here. more soon.

hmm. i have to get on a plane in the morning. and have improv practice soon. i haven’t packed or anything. so why am i blogging? i think they call this procrastination.

i had a great blog entry i meant to write a few days ago. it was after a long day of running around, and had something to do with how lucky i feel that i am to be able to do what i do, to have the concerns i do, to be the person that i have become. as much as things can be difficult. as weird as it is to be feeling sick for months on end. and so on. i am surprised at the sense of inner contentment i have sometimes felt lately, in the face of shaky waters with TDoJB, sickness, a shitty economy, the city i love turning into some kind of weird impoverished disneyworld (”doomsday budget” anyone? but with ads for $2 million condos in every taxicab.).

anyway, the details of that blog entry were lost in those moments. but that was the gist.

tomorrow i visit my mom in wellington, florida, for the thanksgiving week. i am still ill, and now the thing has moved into my sinus cavities and taken over. i’ve had a sinus headache for two straight days, though today’s is slightly better. on antibiotics again. my tonsillectomy is on hold now. we shall see what comes of all this. but at some point i will be healthy again. and while that is pretty status quo for most people i know, i will be the happiest boy in all the land. hopefully soon. maybe some florida sun will fix me up nicely.

i shall blog more from there, perhaps. toodles.

one of my favorite drummers ever. wish i had been around to see the jimi hendrix experience live. very sad. they say he died of natural causes at 61, after just finishing the recent experience hendrix tour (weird?!).

another one of the greats heads off into the ether.

and i wonder. in like fifty years, when beyonce or britney or justin passes on, will the feelings be the same? will memory work in the same way? will those figures carry the same weight and meaning?

this is a short short entry for a big and complex idea. maybe i’ll get into it further down the road. but not now. other things are calling me.

see ya, mitch. you were amazing.

obama wins, and so do i, i think. such a relief. 

i realize that this never could have happened if not for mr. bush and his eight bumbling years. and for that, in some way i guess i am thankful. if not for him, this country would never have gotten to this point. obama would have been a longshot, if just as good a candidate. 

let’s hope that all this talk of change is for real. certainly obama seems like the real deal, and an atypical politician. and that’s what we need right now to restore our faith in government, and our standing in the eyes of governments across the globe. i guess we’ll see what he can do and how it all goes over. it could also be a dangerous time. but it already was. 

why is country music like the “official” music of politics? i have to protest. what kind of a message is that putting out there? but it seems rampant. 

anyway. i’m out. victory is tasting pretty sweet. 

well, i’ve still not been cut open. i’ve had this off/on hacking cough for like two and a half weeks, complete with nasty green stuff coming up. which is weird all by itself. and seemingly not very tonsil related. i think i have been sick in some way for over a month now, actually. crazy. so i show up at the hospital yesterday at the appointed time and they basically decided to send me home because of this crazy cough. so after all the prep and worrying i get to worry about it for another month. at least thanksgiving won’t be at all difficult. so yeah, december 1 now. i get to stress about it all over again. anyway, the tonsil diaries are going to have to be postponed. i know you’re all dying to read them. but my usual meanderings will have to suffice for the next few weeks or so. 

i don’t want to speak too soon. but i think obama is actually going to win the day today. and i really hope i am not wrong. i voted last friday because i expected to be out of it and in pain today. it’s really scary to think of all those red states, all those silly red people. i suppose that these are everyday american values. ones that i do not share in any way. for me this should all be a landslide. but i forget that what i consider to be common sense many in this country would perceive as bleeding-heart liberalism, socialism, anarchism even. i forget that i am this liberal new yorker who’s been educated and pushed enough to ask questions, always. and i sometimes wish that i could relate in some way, any way at all, to these strangers in mississippi or wherever, just so i could understand how they arrive at their points of view. but i don’t get it. they feel very far away. as i’m sure i seem to them. 

i have a lot more to say about all this. but i’m going to sign off for right now.